Uncoordinated Defense

Quest giver: Tapklix
Location: The Dravanian Hinterlands (X:21.9, Y:18.8)
Quest line: Dravanian Sidequests
┗ Dravanian Hinterlands Sidequests
Level: 58
Experience: 13,260
Gil: 602
Previous quest: The Pick of the Bunch
Next quest: Administrative Difficulties
Patch: 3.0
Links: EDB GT TC

Tapklix has lost his patience with the goblins who are supposed to be guarding the settlement.

— In-game description

Steps

Search for the goblin watchguards.

Speak with Tapklix.

Report to Slowfix.

Journal

Tapklix has lost his patience with the goblins who are supposed to be guarding the settlement.

Tapklix is furious that none of the goblins who are guarding Bigwest Shortstop have returned to the camp. The Illuminati have been spotted dangerously close to the camp, but no guards have regrouped to defend it. Find the guards and tell them to return to Bigwest Shortstop. Their posts are at the Makers' Quarter and the Collectors' Quarter.

You find the guards and convince them to return to Bigwest Shortstop. Return there yourself and make sure all of the goblins have made it back safely.

Although the guards have all made it back to Bigwest Shortstop successfully, it seems there is a fundamental problem. None of the goblins can agree on the correct procedure for when they should regroup to defend the camp. But the entire patrol force itself is pointless if they are unable to mount an organized defense. For now, Tapklix will lead the goblins in driving off the Illuminati attack, but he asks you to go to Slowfix and advise him of this worrying situation.

Slowfix is not surprised to learn that the goblin guards are unable to agree on the correct rules, because Idyllshire has no rules! Idyllshire is intended as a "free nation for free people." Rules, procedures, and laws─anything that robs the goblins of their rights and freedom─would run counter to this ideal.

Dialogue

Accepting the quest

Tapklix

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Illuminati draw near, but gobbie watchguards do not return to camp!

Plan is for watchguards to gather and launch backstrike from here if Illuminati approach. But no gobbies gather here at all!

Uplander, please find watchguards and tell them to return! Watchguards should be at Makers' Quarter and Collectors' Quarter.

Search for the goblin watchguards

Optional dialogue

Tapklix

Find watchguards at Makers' Quarter and Collectors' Quarter. Tell them to return here with fastness!

Wide-eyed Watchguard (1)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Hmmm? Illuminati are near? I must return with fastness to Bigwest Shortstop!

Wide-eyed Watchguard (2)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Illuminati!? I did not know! Thank you, uplander. I return to camp now.

Wide-eyed Watchguard (3)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Yes. I saw Illuminati. But they were not close to camp. Not really close.

But if Tapklix asks us to return, I have no choice. I return now.

Speak with Tapklix

Optional dialogue

Wide-eyed Watchguard (1)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Are Illuminati truly near?

Wide-eyed Watchguard (2)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Strange... Where are Illuminati?

Wide-eyed Watchguard (3)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
What!? There is no sign of Illuminati!

Tapklix

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Uplander! Thank you for finding watchguards!

But watchguards, you are all too slow! Illuminati draw very close, but you not return! Rule is simple: return to Bigwest Shortstop if Illuminati pass boulder!

Wide-eyed Watchguard (1)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
No, no! Rule is: return when Illuminati pass watercross! Not boulder!

Wide-eyed Watchguard (2)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
No, no, no, no! Not boulder. Not watercross. Ruins! Rule is: return when Illuminati pass ruins!

Wide-eyed Watchguard (3)

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Wait! Boulder? Which boulder!? Tapklix, you not tell us which boulder!

Tapklix

Pshhh... Shkohhh...
Why you all have different rule!? Patrol is un-useful if you do not report!

Uplander, tell Slowfix about this, please. We will stop Illuminati, but please report problem to Slowfix.